10 Types Of People I Do Not Understand

January 16th, 2006

1. The Annoying People On Friendster

yes, you know the type. they are the ones who add you as a ‘friend’ even though they dont know you. i suspect the victims of Annoying People On Friendster (APOF) are preyed upon because they are in possession of boobage and are armed with the notable ability of taking kawaii pictures of themselves from a downward angle coupled with a strategically-placed peace sign next to their cheek. either that or all APOF think that girls who write “hUh?~ wHaT iS tHiSzsszs~~~” under Affiliations are too dense to realize that they arent actually acquainted with said APOF. oh well, whatever works.

these people get even more annoying when they message you with a ‘hi, can i know u ar? u are very sexy. my name is Tommy-chai and my number is 012-#######. call me when you free ok!’ not once, not twice, but 38403985 times until you get pissed and tell them to fck off for flooding your inbox. and then they message you another 28940385 times to apologize for flooding your inbox. then you find out that they’ve rightclick-saved your pics and uploaded them to their own profile with the caption ‘this is my hot and sexy girlfriend, hands off guys!’. riiight, okay. is this after the 39th time your request for Friend Authorization has been denied, or just the 38th?

i dont get it. Add Friend means you must add your friends, right? why simply go around adding ppl you dunno? very cool issit now, you got 16 accounts full of people that you dont even know? yea lah got all the lengluis and all the Singapore Top Models or whatever, but who are you kidding, nobody really believes that you know all those chicks ok?

2. People On Friendster Who Don’t Add Strangers But Actually Do

“hi, this is a friends-only account so please dont add me unless you know me kthxbai”. okay how many times do we see this line under People I Would Like To Meet? i have lost count of the number of strangers who have that line in their profile yet have taken the liberty to add me up anyway. “but i dont know you,” my message reads. their reply? “it’s okay, Friendster is for making friends!” yes, sure it is, you hypocritical face-saving little bitch with 16 Friendster accounts!

3. Old Men

i dont understand some old men. if you are well in your 30’s and happily married why do you want me to meet up with you at a hotel? that’s just sick. i’m a minor and you’re twice my age. dont kid me, dont kid yourself, dont kid your wife. also dont request nude pics of me while you’re at it. i mean, come on, we’re supposed to be friends. dont pretend to be all buddy-buddy with me, buy me nice things, sweet-talk me and then expect me to get in bed with you at the end of the day. i may be young but i’m not stupid. try another girl, perhaps.

if i were in my 30’s, i wouldnt even go near any girl who’s aged below 20. would YOU? quick, tell me guys, if you were in your 30’s would you chat up a girl who’s below 20? what will your reasons be?

4. People Who Remain In Abusive Relationships

if he hits you, you should walk out.

though i know it’s not always that simple for all cases, but the ones i do know of are not really all that complicated. just walk out. why is it so difficult? quit with all the histrionics about how you cant live without so-and-so. that’s what they all say. you gotta read some Nicholas Sparks. and start loving yourself, baby. life goes on. and it should not involve being physically abused by someone whom you claim loves you just as much as you love him.

5. My Classmates

wah, this one no need for me to elaborate i think. i’ve been bitching about this my whole life.

6. Forum Trolls

hey who ever gets these people? over at RBJ, we just had another one of those idiots who went around picking bones with everybody and just being plain rude while trying to start ‘intelligent debates’. she got so many debate threads locked up (sorry, no exact figure, i lost count) and so many people riled up that she was banned within 24 hours. all this while under anonymity, of course.

what’s the point, really? you sign up at a discussion forum, bellyache and cause ruckus, everyone hates you … and then what? does this fulfill some warped attention-seeking need deep inside of you? what do you get at the end of the day? the justification to your freakishly insane smirks behind the computer screen because you “BURNNNNEEEED!” a few forum admins and moderators? is it very accomplishing to know that you’ve single-handedly managed to make a few people lose their cool? oh, ameliesavatar, you are so influential.

7. Blog Police

okay i’m sure we all know the Xiaxue and The Handicapped Toilets uproar. and the Xiaxue and Kuala Lumpur Sucks uproar. and the Xiaxue and the B-word uproar. and the Xiaxue and The Endorsements uproar. and of course the very latest Xiaxue and Xialanxue uproar! (i admit, i follow all her controversies wan. i cant help it, it’s addictive)

so of course a lot of bloggers (particularly the malaysian ones) are a bit annoyed at her because the last time she came up to KL she completely dissed our city and it’s people and then strutted back to singapore claiming that all malaysia’s good for is the shoes. so when bloggers are annoyed, what do bloggers do? of course they bitch about it on their blog, becauseeeeee ‘what, cannot ar, it’s MY blog okay?! if you dont like then dont read!’

so after said bitching has been done and the comment box is open for commenting, we get all these people accusing said bloggers of leeching traffic off the whole debacle.

:O

i mean have you ever heard anything so stupid. some of these bloggers dont even need the extra traffic. what’s another 200 to a teeming tracker-count of 5000+ a day? it’s almost miscellaneous. i swear, this whole accusation thing feels like some … blogreaders way of making themselves feel important. like wah, you reading my blog because of the whole Xiaxue and Handicapped Toilets issue is SUCH AN HONOUR! can i praise the Lord and give thanks to the issue because it brought me more oh-so-wondrous traffic, ie you?!

then of course there are those fellas who comment things like ‘hey why dont you leave xiaxue alone? that is her blog ok! freedom of speech! freedom of speech!’. and then such remarks are always followed by the famous ‘hypocrite! if she can say what she wants then so can i’ line that is 2nd only to the ‘if you dont like then please click the little x on the upper right corner of your browser kthxbai!’ line, which in this time and age of blogging politics has almost become a mantra for most of us, sob sob.

can you people dont be so weird? sometimes when people blog, it’s not entirely for traffic. get over yourselves, you .. you .. traffic!

8. People Who Date Moneysuckers

sorry babe, she dont love you for you.

9. Stalkers

okay this i really want to know. when a person follows a girl from behind for a whole day, from the moment she leaves her house till the moment she goes back home, does that person not feel in the least bit CREEPY?! stalkers are weird. we all know that. it is a fact. you cannot just follow people around and try to take upskirt photos without being deemed a freaky person whom the cops should be called on. so why do people stalk people and behave like it’s the most normal thing on earth to do? i mean i understand why people stalk, but why do they not find anything wrong with doing it?!

10. Malaysian Police

sorry lah, i must for this one occasion throw away my goggles of blind patriotism. ugh no matter how many times they behave like arrogant stuck up anal-retentive assholes whilst asking for bribes, i can never bring myself to get over the audacity of our police. why cant they do their job with honesty? is it that hard? does the fact that they are our country’s law enforcers by occupation mean anything to them? are roadblocks all they live for? such scum. i spit on them.

Entry Filed under: Lists, Memes

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