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Lovesong to Someone

February 7th, 2006

you bind my heart like a straightjacket. i cant stray now, i cant breathe. all i want is for you to know what you’ve done to me.

when we sleep and when we kiss. that feeling of skin on skin; undescribable. unbelievable. it’s like coming home to someone i know, with a quiet shut of the door and curious eyes that surrender. what can i expect today? i’m watching you sleep. as i draw my fingers across the tempered arch of your back, i suddenly want to just grab fistfuls of you. i want to melt into you like mercury. curl my fingers around the roughness of your skin and imprint the lines of my palms into you so that you are forever mine. this abrupt violence, it’s so implosive i could cry. i cant press myself any tighter against you, this vacuum between us is unbreachable.

i’m scared sometimes, that i may break you. my porcelain doll. my castle of cards. i’m so afraid that i may. but when i dream, you’re all over the floor. in bits and pieces you lie, and i can reach down and pick you up, and inspect you. i can know you, and understand you, and know why you say the things you say and why you fret so over storms in teacups. you and the worried corners of your eyes and the ambivalent taut of your shoulders.. cant you see that i love you too?

i give you all the time in the world and you give me all the confusion in the world. is it so difficult? must we dwell on the big picture? i like the little details. they are comforting because they are insignificant. it’s hard to understand consequence. it’s so pregnant with possibilities. i dont like some of them. they’re too harsh and so out of our hands.

as you sleep, you murmur into my neck. a soft kiss that lingers, and for a brief moment i savour the feeling of the tip of your tongue on my skin. then you reach for my hand, and you clasp it, and when that’s done you hurtle back into the maze of your lethargy again. you’re just so much like a child.

i kiss your forehead and press myself deeper into your side. we are like puzzle pieces. and that’s the last thing i think of before i close my eyes.

curly-haired angel. i know you even in my sleep.

Entry Filed under: Unsent Letters

17 Comments Add your own

1. worldangel | February 7th, 2006 at 7:36 am

wow. you put my feelings into words. amazing.
2. ria | February 7th, 2006 at 9:31 am

beautiful as always :)
3. eric | February 7th, 2006 at 3:06 pm

hmmm.. always a pleasure to read your emotions in art form..

friggin thought provoking.. hehe..

btw, it’s mr. grant again rite? :P
4. pinkpau | February 7th, 2006 at 4:33 pm

worldangel : we share the same feelings then :)

ria : high praise..!

eric : what?! ahaha no this is a real person … :D has always been.
5. Charlie | February 7th, 2006 at 6:17 pm

;_;
6. booha | February 7th, 2006 at 8:27 pm

real person? aah..hmm… =p
7. Asyraf Lee | February 7th, 2006 at 8:30 pm

Jiwangnye… :P
8. Nav | February 7th, 2006 at 8:31 pm

Lol, it’s funny to see a chic who kisses the Add Maths to post something like this

Totally,Utterly brilliant

way to go,
9. Lalita | February 8th, 2006 at 1:57 am

Hey, I am a 30 yr old Malaysian living faaaaar away from home. Stumbled across your site by accident. I was just glancing at some of your stuff. Oh man, that bit about the policemen taking bribes. HOW true is THAT!!!!!!!!!! I mean, you really hit the nail on the head. And you made me laugh with that spitting bit. That was really funny. Keep up the good job!
10. eric | February 8th, 2006 at 2:25 am

hahah.. a new fan among the throngs, lalita? :P

pinkpau: AHA! I knew it! who else could occupy your thoughts as Mr. Grant.. oh well.. people have their idols.. :D
11. emarald | February 8th, 2006 at 3:27 pm

your brother looks so much like ee yeng, or ee yong. your ex anyway
12. pinkpau | February 9th, 2006 at 12:37 am

charlie : kleenex..?

booha : :D

asyraf lee : we all need a little bit of jiwangness in us ..!

nav : why thank you :)

lalita : sigh, dont get me started on the police. i dont even know what to say about them anymore. what the hell was with that headshaving thing with the gamblers!

eric : you’re confused!

emarald : yeah people often tell me that .. :D though i’d like to think my brother’s cuter!
13. eric | February 9th, 2006 at 3:38 pm

*puzzled too*

oh well. :P
14. tze | February 9th, 2006 at 6:06 pm

I KNEW IT WAS ME! curly haired angel.. WAHAHHA. =p
15. Charlie | February 9th, 2006 at 10:45 pm

No need ;_; I want to bask more in the touching-ness
16. pinkpau | February 9th, 2006 at 11:47 pm

eric : hahaha .. lost boy

tze : if it was you, beautiful would have been thrown in, my dear!

charlie : okie dokie .. :D
17. bmw salvage&hellip | May 14th, 2006 at 9:26 pm

bmw salvage…

bmw salvage…

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