Lim Family’s Annual Contribution To Air Pollution
April 10th, 2006
after so much procrastination, the KL-based relatives on my dad’s side and my family finally managed to settle on a date that everyone could agree on. every year we embark on this family tradition that has to be upheld with all in-town family members present, and with extreme enthusiam and gaiety, or else our elders will twist our ears and make us buy them beer. for some odd reason this usually happens on a Monday. the tradition, i mean, not the beer.
so i slapped on some sunscreen, grabbed my sunnies, a good book and a diet Coke.
and went to camwhore with my grandma.
i know that if i launch into a lengthy know-it-all explanation on the tradition of the Ching Ming Festival for the benefit of the non-Chinese folk, i am just going to make myself sound very stupid and at the same time open up an avenue for Sieu Theng to laugh at me till kingdom come. see, i’m not exactly the most culture-savvy Chinese girl in KL, so i’m gonna try to save myself some face and not attempt to blog about this festival like i know it inside out, cos i dont. embarassingly.
but basicallyyyy, it’s a festival for the Chinese to honour their ancestors. we go to their graves, clear their gravestones, and place food offerings before them. for some families, this is like a reunion or a family picnic thing, almost. it’s a happy occasion.
(okay, i couldnt possibly have gotten that wrong, right?!)
so for once, my family was actually early. this is the shocker to end all shockers, cos we are always the latest to arrive no matter what the freaking occasion. see, i told you all oredi, the reason why i’m always late is cos it’s heriditary. BELIEVE ME LAH!
we were like an hour early and i was so bored. and since my brothers and my father and my mother wouldnt camwhore with me, i camwhored with the Gods of the Earth and Sky!
no fun. they were very stony camwhore partners.
after a while, my relatives arrived with all the necessary Ching Ming stuff. yay! for the food offerings, there was dim sum, meat, cakes, muffins, fruits and my grandma’s favourite Stout, haha. so much food for such a small woman.
and holy shit, check it out man, Granny’s got a brand new Merc Benz!!!
this reminded me of a convo that i had with Jovann et al back in Form 2, so just to annoy my dad i asked him, “eh you all burn car for Eema (granny), you think hell got gas station ah?”
“aiyah dont ask stupid questions.”
“you burn her a TV, she got electricity meh!”
“…”
“and then ah, you burn mahjong set without the mahjong table, what’s the use?”
“this is a chinese tradition, we just follow, okay?” dad sighs.
“i’m not saying i dowanna follow. i’m just saying it’s very funny. actually you burn her a Merc no point also, she doesnt even have a driver’s license. hey maybe you should burn her a driver’s license!!!”
“stupid, look at the car properly, got chaffeur wan la!”
wah, really wor.
“wei, then you burn Grandma paper money, does that mean there are banks in Hell? who works there? is there a Hell Maintenance Organization on Earth that burns banks and bank staff for the Hellers as well? can dead people apply for jobs in Hell?? huh??”
“shaddup lah.”
while my dad was entertaining my dumb questions, my mom was frantically asking Grandma for tomorrow’s lottery numbers. she does this by ripping up small pieces of numbered paper and shakes them till 4 numbers drop out in order. i’m sure all you ppl with ah-sum mothers like mine will know about this. anyway here’s the number she got -
dont tell my mom i put this picture up!! if really strike, she’ll have to share the prize money with y’all. she isnt going to like that :D but i’m gonna go out on a limb here and share the secret number to tomorrow’s million dollar jackpot with you guys! go on, say it, i’m super nice.
so we just sat and chilled while waiting for Grandma to ‘finish’ her food. man, i remember the day she passed away. it was 1998, and i was sleeping over at Smartypants’ house during the school holidays. one morning at the ungodly hour of 7 a.m, she woke me up and said “wei your mother called. your Eema passed away.”
i was like, “haha. dont bluff.” and went back to sleep.
at the funeral later that day, i was just like @_@ holy crapola.
it was such a long time ago. she’d be 72 if she was still alive. and still drinking Guinness and smacking my granddad upside the head, i’ll bet.
37 Comments Add your own
1. Cla | April 10th, 2006 at 9:47 pm
Is that Nilai Memorial Park?
2. ss19flyover | April 10th, 2006 at 10:39 pm
Did u hantam the 4D in sport toto? Guinness without siew yuk is imcomplete lah….:P
3. reallybites | April 10th, 2006 at 11:15 pm
wah ur relatives so few niaaaaaa.
4. sinta | April 10th, 2006 at 11:46 pm
Your grandmother used to drink Guiness 0_o. What a woman!
5. Waifon | April 11th, 2006 at 12:00 am
Wah..damn meriah man your Ching Ming. And I find burning those paper money and mercedes funny too. You should have seen those paper bikinis man. Damn cun.
I’ve never been to my grandparents’ graves before.
Daddy never allowed=C
6. pinkpau | April 11th, 2006 at 12:09 am
cla : yep !
ss19flyover : haha nah, i’ll leave that to my mom. and yup there was siew yoke :)
reallybites : haha two of my cousins didnt make it cos got exams. the rest of my dad’s side are all not in msia :(
sinta : lol yes, lots of it too :P
waifon : hah but why? if i so much as hint that i dont wanna go for ching ming, my dad will explode wan
7. Waifon | April 11th, 2006 at 12:59 am
it’s a big hassle kot cuz the entire extended family will be there even the ones from overseas will be back.
It will look a lil more like a celebration instead.0.o??!
Haha.
I offered to go but always been declined. Maybe it’s superstitions?
Like it’s not good or something for KIDS [omg] to tag along, fear that the thingy will follow you back?
Haha..I read too much Russel Lee ar..russel lee right? the singapore horror tale author. Quite idiotic la to believe those stories.heh:D
8. ArtificiallyVerbose | April 11th, 2006 at 1:21 am
wat time did u go??
back when i was in m’sia i always had to wake up at 5am to go… some sort of traditional time or something…
the weirdest thing i’ve ever seen was a passport and an airplane ticket being burnt.
9. AbbyC. | April 11th, 2006 at 1:59 am
ur ching meng seems a nice reunion lol.. it seems fun lolx.. minus the hot
10. expectation | April 11th, 2006 at 2:01 am
WTF why u talk about ching ming also so funny wan? no respect for god ah! hor hor ta ta yor.
11. Random Surfer | April 11th, 2006 at 6:35 am
How refreshingly upbeat for what can typically be a solemn outing! :)
The ‘camwhoring with gramma’ caught me off guard though…good job.
Cheers,
12. cK | April 11th, 2006 at 7:07 am
You know, Ching ming is one of the events that I hated most but you made it sound like you’re enjoying it….what a good grand daughter u are…maybe because me and my family have too many places to go… Come to think of it, it’s been a long time since the last time I went…
btw…u know your previous post “why you so like that”…do u by any chance have that song? very old liao the song..
13. Susan | April 11th, 2006 at 7:44 am
wah your grandma has the coolest car and chaffeur! so neat some more… ;p
14. eWe | April 11th, 2006 at 8:01 am
rotfl…
this is very much close to a xia xue post. XXD
15. kristof | April 11th, 2006 at 11:05 am
Camwhoring with your grandma. lol. thats… funny in a freaky way.
16. bulat | April 11th, 2006 at 11:08 am
hhahahahaha this whole post is so unexpected^^” and yea me and my cousins always talk bout ‘burn house no maid’ or ‘burn clothes no undergarments’ oops.
and btw what camera are you using? your pictures always come out super clear!!O_o
17. justakid | April 11th, 2006 at 12:21 pm
:) hehe i always liked the ching ming reunion too.. we’d all go back 2 ipoh.. usually it’s a nice family thing.. minus the heat from the burnings and all laaarh >
18. secretbear | April 11th, 2006 at 1:44 pm
:D
19. ria | April 11th, 2006 at 3:02 pm
omg, that chaffeured merc is so cute! :P
20. ric | April 11th, 2006 at 7:10 pm
ahahaha i thought ching ming was suppose to be some “solemn” occasion XP
21. Ginny | April 11th, 2006 at 10:01 pm
hahahah! my uncle more yeng.. that time my grandpa passsed away.. he made me n my cousin donate our digimon stickesr and figurins.. i asked for what…he said to protect my grandfather.. ;p
22. tze | April 11th, 2006 at 11:04 pm
hmm i didnt know christians celebrate ching ming also. AND DIDNT U KNOW ITS BAD LUCK TO TAKE PICS LIKE THAT?!?!!?!
23. pinkpau | April 11th, 2006 at 11:57 pm
waifon : haha yes, russell lee ..!
artificially : WAH 5am so early!! we got up at like 7, went for breakfast and stuff and arrived there at 10am. hahahahahaha that flight ticket + passport thing is the funniest shit!!! hahahaha
abby c : wasnt that hot that day, so it wasnt so bad :)
expectation : what god?! haha my grandma only wat!
random : really, they’re supposed to be solemn? mine are always fun .. haha
cK : no, sorry, dont have that song! but now that i’ve recalled the tune .. it’s stuck in my head. arhghghg!
susan : yalor i’m so jealous. stupid dad, love his mother only. dont sayang the daughter at all ..!!
ewe : yay, i’m learning fast .. :D
kristof : hahaha! dead people should be able to camwhore too..
bulat : i use a canon ixus 500. dont like it. very pissed at it. wanna change >:(
justakid : wow, ipoh! good excuse to eat yummy food every year, keke
secretbear : :D
ria : it’s all ashes now .. or rather, ‘claimed’ by my grandma at the underworld’s post office .. lol!
ric : issit?! i thought it’s supposed to be like a happy family reunion wan?!
ginny : haha OMG?! so cute!! (eh, do you have trouble posting comments on my blog? i donno why but your comments end up in my Spam net all the time)
tze : haha i’m christian but i’m still chinese!! what lah u! and what, who said it’s bad luck?!
24. george | April 12th, 2006 at 12:45 am
everyone in hell drives a mercedes benz :P
and wow, i never thought i’d ever see a person smiling in a cemetery haha
25. cK | April 12th, 2006 at 1:41 am
haha I just found the song. want it?
26. JR | April 12th, 2006 at 12:56 pm
Wa,burn mercz,eat alot of petrol la,petrol price in hell got raise or not?
27. Jay | April 12th, 2006 at 1:55 pm
A benz eh? I rather get that Audi from Top Gear, the one that did 800 miles on one tank. Now, THAT’s a car!!
28. passer-by | April 12th, 2006 at 2:50 pm
star star star wars t-shirt
so nice lehh, where did u buy it?
29. Lalita | April 12th, 2006 at 4:28 pm
My grandmother LOVES stout too … I’ve never tried it personally but one of the girls I work with was saying how nice it was. The rest of us just gave her THE look.
30. vvens | April 12th, 2006 at 5:53 pm
.. *_* i was stunned with your first picture.
how can you do that….? ;p
31. Pierce Munro | April 12th, 2006 at 10:44 pm
and one thing. i hate going back to ipoh.
BOSAN-NYAAAAA!!!
hiehiehie funny la u. choose the yr Grandma’s Gravestone as camwhore partner. =p=p
bleh *pokes u*
they DO have banks and stuff la.
i think……..=p=p
32. tze | April 13th, 2006 at 12:41 am
no, not insulting or anything la wei.. hahaha. just that i thought ching ming (burning stuff giving things to ancestors all that) are only practised by buddhists/taoists/whatever branches of buddhism out there. okay i shall stop here in case i get bashings from christians. =p
ITS DISRESPECTFUL I TELL YOU!
33. pinkpau | April 13th, 2006 at 1:51 am
george : exactly! how come there are no other paper-car makes out there? i’d want a flashy BMW convert instead of a big hulking silver merc..
cK : haha yeah! how are you gonna send it?
JR : if hell is really as fiery as they say it is .. i shudder to think how they pump petrol in their cars..
jay : i’ll remember that at your funeral .. :D
passerby : it’s a seriously old shirt! i’ve had it since i was 11, hahaha. my aunt brought back a whole bunch of Phantom menace tshirts when she came back from HK.
lalita : why why why? whats wrong with stout?
vvens : haha alamaks!! cannot wan issit?! my parents din really say anything .. lol they said small kids do anything also nevermind wan, ghosts wont get angry. haha!
pierce : yea, banks and like ‘ports’ where they recieve stuff from earth .. hahaa
tze : haha chinese christians can celebrate chinese holidays .. :D it’s a cultural thing, not a religious thingy. no lah not disrespectful, my granny wont take offense wan .. :D
34. cK | April 13th, 2006 at 2:09 am
im so bored. how? easy….check ur gmail…
35. pinkpau | April 13th, 2006 at 3:01 am
LOL!! listening to it now!! ahhahahahahaha that is some FUNNY SHIT. brings back memories .. thanks!!
36. cK | April 13th, 2006 at 4:22 am
haha u’re welcome!
37. Lalita | April 13th, 2006 at 6:27 am
Just biased lah against Stout - guess cos of the way it looks and smells. It is meant to be really good for you though!
Do you like it? I promise I won’t give you the look … =)
Leave a Comment
Some HTML allowed:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>
Trackback this post | Subscribe to the comments via RSS Feed