The Sigh
May 31st, 2006
i generally hang out with happy people. the only times they arent happy are during the one-on-one, heart-to-heart talks that are facilitated by alcohol .. but those moments dont come around often. so most of the time, i am in the company of very happy people. either that or they repress their sadness very well, and wear happy-masks very efficiently. but anyway. my point is that i’ve forgotten what it’s like to be around sad people. well, not so much forgotten. rather more, it’s just one of those things you dont think about when it’s not happening to you.
the last time i clearly remember being around a sad person a lot, was my stint with the second-from-last boyfriend. he wasnt a SAD person, but a sad person. meaning to say, he isnt the sobby, angsty, self-mutilating, the-world-understands-me-not kinda sad person, but he’s just .. well, sad. as in he’s a bleak person, a grey soul, complete with the lifeless eyes. no passion, no zing for anything. i’d describe his sadness more, but i wont, because it is spiritually draining for me to even write the words.
essentially, i believe that’s what our relationship was - spiritually draining. for both of us. i felt so sapped of my happiness and cheer all the time, like one always feels when one is around sad people. and he was sapped too, because i never was able to give him what he needed. it was a sad, cyclic, depressive relationship for the both of us, one that ended for the better.
today, on the way back home, i was in the cab of a cabbie who reminded me very much of aforementioned ex. as in he had that same quietly sad demeanor, the same droop at the corner of his eyes, the same ‘i’d ask you to step all over me, but i’m not worth your time anyway’ gloom lingering over his shoulders. within 5 minutes of entering the car, i felt sad myself. i wanted to give him a hug.
and this man, he kept sighing. the traffic light turned red, he sighed. a car tried to cut in, he sighed. a motorcycle flew past us at the junction, nearly taking off his side mirror, he sighed. someone sounded the horn at him, he sighed. is it weird if i said i could feel him getting older and older as he sighed his years away?
i wanted to reach out. tap on his shoulder and ask. what’s wrong? are you okay? why are you so sad?
is there anything i can do?
but i didnt. and that’s exactly the problem isnt it? we see sad people all the time but we never bother to do anything about it.
i left my strawberry sweets behind for him, though. i hope that somehow helps.
sigh!
Entry Filed under: General
24 Comments Add your own
1. TheRealAnonymous | May 31st, 2006 at 3:54 am
Wow… i’m the 1st to write a comment !! =Þ
Well.. its probably too late to say this now… but I think if u gave him a tip instead, it would’ve made his day.
Or maybe if u pass by a McDonald’s on the way back, u could ask him to stop, go in, then get yourself and him a cup of tea. =)
And when u get out of the cab… give him a word of encouragement or two.. u’re good with words, i’m sure u could come up with something… something like “happiness comes to those who are thankful for what they have”, and tell him not to sigh over things he wished he had, but more rather to count his blessings.
The speech is a powerful tool. A single word could inspire a man, or make the most ambitious man give up his dreams.
And more imporatantly, its all about closure… =)
2. alvin | May 31st, 2006 at 5:54 am
That reminds me of that robot from Hitchhiker’s Guide to Galaxy…..
Marvin the sad robot….
3. Jon | May 31st, 2006 at 6:01 am
The strawberry sweets was cute =).
4. entwined | May 31st, 2006 at 8:10 am
:) that is the sweetest thing i’ve heard for a very long time.
yeah i agree with you. it’s difficult to overcome the barrier between strangers, but sometimes, that little effort in breaking it down is all it takes to make the other person happy.
i think we all need to put in a little effort in doing that.
5. chris | May 31st, 2006 at 12:09 pm
haih….
6. Celestina | May 31st, 2006 at 3:32 pm
“…we see sad people all the time but we never bother to do anything about it.”
I am guilty of doing that too :(
7. Kz | May 31st, 2006 at 3:53 pm
wei….
i’m sad tooo…..
can you leave me a peanut butter kitkat in my car?
8. Calypso | May 31st, 2006 at 4:22 pm
Every time I see a sad person, I pop them a smile and ask them if they’re all right. Even if they aren’t, its always nice to just say ‘I’ll be right over there if you need someone to talk to’ or ‘call me if you need me’ Although they may not necessarily want to do that, its always nice to have someone else be concerned about your well-being.
9. Calypso | May 31st, 2006 at 4:36 pm
of course not to a complete stranger. but then again could just ask them if they’re okay.
10. tze | May 31st, 2006 at 6:05 pm
that was a real sweet gesture. i’m proud of you. *pats your back*
11. Ee Wah | May 31st, 2006 at 6:40 pm
Aww…you were so sweet to do that! ^^ Poor taxi driver man…hope those sweets made him feel better.
12. ArtificiallyVerbose | May 31st, 2006 at 7:15 pm
most people in this world we live in are individualist. unless you present them a benefit they won’t give a damn about you. that’s y most people don’t do anything when they see sad people.
egalitarians like you and calypso are a dying breed indeed.
13. bulat | May 31st, 2006 at 8:27 pm
sighhhh*pops chocolate into mouth. offers one to pinkpau : )
14. alex | May 31st, 2006 at 9:29 pm
sign…….
why the world gimme so little….
15. iviane | May 31st, 2006 at 9:33 pm
leave me some?
16. eric | May 31st, 2006 at 10:40 pm
don’t have to leave me any. just leave them for all the sad people you encounter. :P
so nice, i read your post and i hmm.. sorta felt like you were the kindest person in the world. hahhaah..
how come you always notice the taxi drivers wan.. and i bet one fine day, he’ll go: eh~ you’re the girl who left me those strawberry sweets!. without the sighs, of course. hehe
17. Susan | May 31st, 2006 at 10:47 pm
awwww you’re so cute and sweet !!
18. pinkpau | June 1st, 2006 at 2:31 am
therealanonymous : about the tip, i actually considered it, but then i thought it would seem really.. i dont know whats the word, disrespectful? and it’s quite a sad thing to know that money would be the only option that can make someone smile ..! about the coke, haha a cabbie actually did that TO me once. hey u know what, i’m gonna blog about this. hahaha
alvin : oh hahaha marvin the sad robot! i loved him!! he talked like prof severus snape from harry potter.
jon : i just hope he likes strawberry sweets..
entwined : yes we do .. unfortunately i think a lot of us are either just indifferent or scared :(
chris : haiiiiih.
celestina : let’s start a movement to change this habit :D
kz : hehe soon my friend, soon
calypso : hehe you ARE a dying breed :)
tze : but i kinda regretted not asking him if he was okay. i was just so scared! @_@
ee wah : i hope so too!! hope he’s not a diabetic or someone who doesnt like sweets :(
artificially : hehe very diplomatic la ur comment
bulat : why thank you!! haha i’m very picky with my chocolates tho..!
alex : do you give the world a lot or a little? :D
iviane : eheh okay!
eric : i’d be really happy if he can remember me. hehe!
susan : aww it’s just leaving sweets behind .. :) i’m sure a lot of people would have done more! i was just like. scared. hahaha and didnt really know what to do.
19. eric | June 1st, 2006 at 2:46 am
most people wouldn’t even look twice at the driver, let alone think whether he’s okay.. cabbie’s a lucky guy to have you as a passenger.. =)
20. ArtificiallyVerbose | June 1st, 2006 at 3:02 am
well i can’t help it if the truth is diplomatic ;)
i guess i’m just not born for jerry springer *sigh*
21. foreverjas | June 3rd, 2006 at 11:31 pm
wow.usually when i sit taxi with my frens. i usually choose the oldest man as the driver.hahax. if anything happens can fight wert.. if not.. mayb he really needs the money… so sad.. life’s..like this.. i dunoo..jz sad.. u usually take taxi alone uh?
22. pinkpau | June 4th, 2006 at 2:12 am
eric : *blush*
artificially : nope you’re not .. :D
foreverjas : yes, a lot :P
23. Anonymous | August 10th, 2006 at 8:05 pm
You’re nice, but reading your blog made me want to kill myself.
24. pinkpau | August 10th, 2006 at 10:17 pm
what?? why??
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