A Different Shade Of Pink

February 3rd, 2007

‘darling, cover your eyes,’ he’d say calmly and immediately i’d squeeze my eyes shut. i dont have to ask why to know why. i know that he knows what’s best for me. ‘is it over,’ i’ll whisper after a few seconds. he always answers honestly, and sometimes he reaches over to hold my hand or stroke my hair. it is times like these, as my eyes are tightly closed and we are sitting there in silence, that i am overwhelmed by the maturity he can sometimes show. i could love this guy. i do love this guy.

the other day i was in a cab coming home from pj. it was almost midnight and i just really wanted to get home as soon as possible. the cabbie wasnt much of a conversationalist, but that was fine by me cos i wasnt feeling too chatty either. we slowed to a halt at the edinburgh intersection’s red lights, and the moment we stopped, i turned to look out the window. then i saw what i saw. for a moment i was puzzled. what is that?, i wondered. then it dawned upon me, and i quickly clapped my hands over my eyes, but a little too late. i’d seen it. and the horror of the situation would keep coming back to haunt me, i know it. i know it because it happened once before.

but who’s going to warn me now? i cant take care of myself. i wont. i may seem angry, irritated, and i may push you away, but all i really need is for you to take care of me.

Entry Filed under: Unsent Letters