Mirror Exchanges
the evening sun was out and i was standing there choking back dust. an old eighties song was playing on the shabby radio that had lots of little glittery stickers stuck on it. the air had a fluttery cigarette smoke finish that i would later find clinging to my hair. I Heart Pak Lah, said a little poster lazily tacked to the wall with dirty pieces of tape. some men were wolfwhistling at a chinese woman in tights and knee high boots who was rolling her eyes as she talked on her pink flip-phone that doubled up as a menagerie.
it was then that i realized, people just want to be special. this is the mother of all cheat codes when it comes to navigating the twists and turns and hidden passageways of the social arena. as much as people have their little idealistic plasticine models of the perfect boyfriend or the perfect best friend, it ultimately boils down to how the other person makes you feel. we are all attention-seeking whores; we like attention and we like to know that we are more special than the girl or guy next door or anyone you ever had in your life. we like to be at the apex of the bell curve. and that is why playing hard to get almost never yields results - instead, one has to make the other person feel accepted and good about themselves, be it through the attention given or any other concievable means. no one likes to feel left out.
like i said, people just want to be special. what’s special? long handwritten cards, showing them photos from your childhood, sharing stories and insecurities, a cup of coffee, no secrets, compliments whispered in bed, proudly telling all your friends, defending them when your friends point out their flaws, supporting them, believing in them, knowing how they like their eggs, exclusive trust, tenderness, bringing them home to meet your parents, opening up, holding hands, saying i love you, not noticing other members of the opposite sex, protectiveness, sticking together no matter what, letting yourself go.
that’s special. that’s inclusion. that’s family. that’s what people want. how do you expect someone to feel comfortable with you if you make them feel like a stranger?
Comments April 22nd, 2007
