The Opposite Of Travel

June 27th, 2007

it starts with the crisp lemony smell of the cabin, followed by the flight attendants’ checking of your boarding pass to tell you which of the two aisles to go down. i used to really dislike the former but i have since developed a kind of nonchalance toward it, and the latter i try to avoid completely by pretending to be totally absorbed in the headlines of the local newspaper i just picked up even if it’s in a foreign language.

i’m talking about coming home. as fun and exciting as travel is, there is nothing like the fluttery feeling that you get in your stomach as you step on the plane to return home. time sloshes around in a beaker when you’re on the plane; all those hours garnished with peanuts and orange-juice-from-a-carton trudge on like days on end, and even when you wake up from a nap and think that you’re almost at your destination, you’re actually not, and there’s still a long way more to go. sigh. books dont even help anymore these days, i cant remember the last time any book was reliable company during a flight, despite the fact that i’ve read some good books lately.

when i got home last night, the first thing i did was eat a cup of instant noodles. then i laid on my bed (which now smells suspiciously like it was imperialised by Short Brother), and stared at the smattering of glow-in-the-dark stars on my ceiling which i taped up there when i was 13 but then got lazy and never finished taping all of them up.

anyway yes kawan-kawan sekalian, i am home, but only till monday before i am off again. ya i know. dont whack me. lately it seems every phone or email conversation i have begins with “hey su ann are you in kl?”. slowly but surely my circles are starting to do things without me because they assume (and not wrongly either) that i’m not in town. i am trying my best not to mind.

and a big thank you to all the people who still take some time off to check on me whether or not i’m in town :) as well as furiously hunt me down for dinner or movies or just to chill when i’m back. it’s always very nice and at times like these i am reminded of who my real friends are.

i jinxed myself the other day. on the plane to Singapore, i realized with some irritation that i had forgotten to pack my cosmetics case. there was just this very vivid picture of that darn orange mesh bag sitting on my desk at home. so when i got to Changi, i immediately went to MAC and bought 400 bucks worth of makeup essentials; bless travel-sized (and travel sized-priced!) brush sets!

but thennnnnnnnn, later when i got to Hong Kong, i found that i DID actually pack my cosmetics case! arghghghhgh so i spent 400 bucks for nothing.

and now one week later and back home, i unpacked to find that i left BOTH my cosmetics case AND my newly bought makeup at Martian’s place. !!!!!!! sibeh tulan. how now you tell me.

ditz moments aside, i’ve been highly strung and stressed out lately. too many things to do and too little time, as well as expectations that are too high. sometimes i dont quite know what to do with myself. and the not knowing what to do infuriates me to no end.

i’ve always been a high achiever, or at least that’s what i want to be. falling short of my own standards and not getting what i want make me angry. and then when i try to tell people that, they say i’m a perfectionist, as if it’s so bad to have aims and goals. so i tell myself these people know nothing about drive, they know nothing about ambition. but then i feel bad after that for thinking such thoughts against people who just dont know the right things to say to someone who just needs a little bit of encouragement.

in the KLIA Express on the way back to KL Sentral, i ate peanut butter cups and just stared out the window for the entire ride. it was a splendid 28 minutes.

————

because Kiasu Andrew promised me badges and bumper stickers :

TheCICAK has launched a competition themed 50 Years, 50 Heroes: Young Malaysians You Need to Know in conjunction with Malaysia’s 50th Merdeka Day.

All you have to do is write a story of 1,000 words or less in English or Malay, take a photograph, and you stand a chance at winning the grand prize of RM5000 cash. The best 50 stories will also be published into a book. Submissions deadline is July 15th 2007.

If you are confused or have questions or want to take advantage of the special deadline that only a select few know about, email Andrew Loh at andrewlza[at]gmail[dot]com. Remember to say that you also want a badge and a bumper sticker.

Entry Filed under: General, Rants

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