What It Means To Be Malaysian
August 31st, 2008
Happy Merdeka, everyone! a bit late where you guys are, i know, but it’s still the 31st here.
i had this really long Merdeka Day post drafted out in my head, but it’s a nice sunday afternoon and after a delectable lunch of mystery meat with gray gravy from the dining hall, i’m feeling too comfortably sleepy and lazy to do anything, much less kick my brain into action to write a long essay. but just to lessen the degree of my laziness, i will tell you the title of my Merdeka Day post that is now never to be. it was supposed to be called ‘What It Means To Be Malaysian’.
being Malaysian, i think, will have a whole different meaning for me now that i am abroad. it’s too early now to say just how different, but it’s only been a week and already i’m feeling the slight shifts in momentum. for instance, news were so accessible back home, and conversations about the latest national or local issues happened so often because everyone knew what was going on or at the very least, were interested to know. i felt close to these issues; i knew them well and i was comfortable speaking my mind. but over here, i worry about misrepresenting Malaysia to a bunch of people who already think that Malaysia is a country of political assassination, high crime rate, errant cab drivers, racial injustice and human rights oppression. and the sad thing is, these opinions arent unfounded. i am torn between admitting that they are right (and they are), or pulling out the old ‘yes well, but not everyone in Malaysia is like that..’ line. would it be unpatriotic for me to do the former? and conversely, would grasping at straws to paint a better picture of Malaysia cause me to misrepresent the country?
we had a discussion the other day about classroom culture in our respective countries. they asked those of us who were encouraged to speak up in class and debate with their teachers to stand on one side of the room, and those of us who were brought up to NOT challenge our teachers to stand on the other side. on the other side, it was just me, one kid from Corea and four kids from China. the rest of the room, and that’s something like 40 people, were on the side where they were encouraged from young to speak up in class and challenge their teachers to nurture individuality and critical thinking.
some people later asked me to explain why i was on that side of the room, and i said something like, “in Malaysia, they say they want you to speak up and form your own opinions, but when you do it, especially when you say something in disagreement with a teacher, they think you are disrespectful or speaking out of turn.” back in high school, i actually did not speak up much in class, because well, NOBODY spoke up much in class.. but i remember during the times that i did, i would get remarks like “you cikgu ke saya cikgu?” (are you the teacher or am i the teacher?) or impatient looks.
also, i remember how we were generally not encouraged to engaged in discussion. teachers come in, write on the whiteboard and blab to a bunch of faces, give homework and leave. they are friendly with us and everything, but in the classroom, they dont ask us what we think, they dont encourage us to speak up if we have differing opinions, they dont make it a learner-centric environment. it’s pure regurgitation from one source to another. this is my view on our education back home. and i shared it with my new collegemates who were very baffled that such a system was meant to educate and shape young people’s minds. and then i felt uncomfortable after that, and i wondered if i should have said all that, or if i should have sugarcoated anything. what would people think of Malaysia now?
the truth?
is that a bad thing or a good thing?
for every day that i’ve been here, the first thing i do when i wake up in the morning is check my email and read Malaysiakini. i always introduce myself as Su Ann from Malaysia, and i make sure that my new friends call me by Su Ann and not some truncated version. i brought a big Malaysian flag to pin up on my wall. i’m always happy to talk about Malaysia, both the good things and the bad. i brought lots of Malaysian food to share and cook if there are going to be cook-outs. i am always polite and i force myself to talk even when i’m too tired to hold conversations or simply dont feel like speaking, because i dont want people to think that Malaysians are unfriendly or unsociable, or that Malaysians cant be intelligent because they are products of a discouraging education system. over here, i’m not just me.. i’m also a Malaysian.
like i said earlier, it’s too early for me to tell what it means to be Malaysian over here in NYC, but i’m sure it will be clearer and clearer to me as i navigate the next 4 years. and it’s going to be an adventure :)
i spent my Merdeka Day in Philadelphia (a city in the neighboring state Pennsylvania) with Martian and my aunt. i was soooooooooo happy because my aunt took us out for Malaysian food in this restaurant called Banana Leaf!!!!!! what we had:
roti canai, which was crispier and thinner than what we’re used to back home. something like roti tisu, but tastes exactly like roti canai! gooooooood
hainanese chicken rice. awesome rice, but the chicken was just a tad drowned in soy sauce.
nasi lemak with the best achar ever!!!!!! this brought tears to my eyes *emo
char kway teow!!!!!!!
kangkung belacan, which i just HAD to have cos i missed it so much. this is my favorite vegetable dish of all time. i was so happy they had this on the menu…!
cendol with real gula melaka… *heart*
sigh so blissful. it was such a good dinner. everything tasted like the real thing back home.
over dinner, my aunt told me that it was surprising that i was homesick, and that she thought i was the last person to be. well.. i definitely dont hate the fact that i’m here in America and away from home; i love it actually. i love all the new things and the excitement of change, the fact that i’m going to be learning so much and i’m going to be seeing a lot of things that i’ve never seen before and that will change my outlook on life forever. i am always going to be grateful for this opportunity that i got. but the thing is.. my life back home was great. so of course i will miss it. i had a lot of freedom to do anything i wanted, school was easy, i made my own money, i had family who were always there for me no matter what, i had real and true friends who loved and supported me and are so much fun to hang out with, i could see Martian so often, i knew exactly where to go if i needed to buy something, i knew my own city inside out.. everything was familiar. i didnt want for anything, because i had everything i could possibly want. i had so much love and everything was just at my fingertips.
and that’s what i miss. i miss the love, the warmth and comfort and the accessibility of everything. that’s why i’m homesick. of course, i do know that i’m now in an exciting new place that is bursting with possibilities, opportunities, uniqueness and also love.. but it’s different. i know i’m going to be very happy for the next 4 years, and i will have so much to share about NYC and America here in my blog, but at the back of my head, i will always miss Malaysia. i will always still want to know what’s going on back home, i will always be more than happy to talk about my country to people who are unfamiliar with it, and i will always be glad to talk in Manglish to any fellow Malaysians i happen to come across.
there really is no place like home. Happy 51st Birthday, Malaysia :)
guess i wasnt so lazy to write this post after all!
Entry Filed under: General
76 Comments Add your own
1. real_cranium | August 31st, 2008 at 4:41 pm
Happy Independence Day pau!
=))
2. pinksterz | August 31st, 2008 at 4:42 pm
why there is no char kuey tiow in egypt T_____________T i miss ckt alot *sobs*
3. Jeff | August 31st, 2008 at 4:43 pm
Dang, did you ate all that???
*salute!*
4. Matt | August 31st, 2008 at 5:02 pm
happy merdeka day!
haha i think we’re going there tonight too
5. Sharon | August 31st, 2008 at 5:10 pm
Su Ann, you dont know just how LUCKY you are!!! Msian food, and all sooo authentic at that!!! Here where I live, I cant even find damn chili to make sambal and what not. Asian ingredients, what more, FOOD does not exist here! :( So much for glorious Italian food, I want my damn CKT and nasi lemak already dammit!
6. Michelle | August 31st, 2008 at 5:33 pm
Sigh. You know the classroom culture thing is being brought over to my classes here? It always feels weird when I’m the only one answering or questioning things while the others are so quiet… Well, there are people who are like me but you can’t find them often. My Literature lecturer was like making the funniest remark ever: “Don’t stare at me like my cat. Say something. Maybe my cat is even better than you lot.”
= =
And even though the Merdeka Celebration is huge here, it means nothing to me. Being a Malaysian, I can only acknowledge the good food, good shopping and certainly the love I’ve been getting back and home. And freedom, yes. While people think that coming over to a new place is freedom from parents, it makes me feel as if my life is constricted. Because things are so new around you, you just don’t know what to do. Even though I’m like 6 months here, sometimes, I find myself lost. And homesick.
You guys should do pot luck or something. :D
7. chrissy | August 31st, 2008 at 5:46 pm
It is so true how discussions are somewhat discouraged in Malaysian classrooms! When I first came to the UK for high school, I was quite surprised how most of my classmates were quite happy to raise their hands up to question, despite knowing what they propose may not be 100% accurate but it’s something definitely worth admiring.
You shouldn’t worry about sugarcoating anything. No system is perfect and each has their flaws with different goals in mind. Such oppressive teaching methods are not only conducted in Malaysia, most Asian countries do too with one objective in mind: teach the students the designated syllabus and have them pass with flying colours. Where got time to answer so many questions that aren’t even in the exam lah!
This is why I love humanities; there is no right or wrong answer, haha! (Great for exams)
8. foreverjas | August 31st, 2008 at 6:15 pm
awww. nice post. i miss char koay teow !!! :(
9. alvin | August 31st, 2008 at 7:13 pm
i think your dilemma is shared by many from other countries :).
but hey, there’s no perfect system or nation in the world we live in. The classical Rome is considered as the most advanced civilization in its time. Public forum, proper place to poop, irrigation and all the magistrates but yet corruption and political killings were norms. Up north the Rome empire is this so called barbaric, uncivilized Germania tribes. They didn’t have proper rules or hierarchical class system and lived a nomadic life. But they were a tight knitted bunch and would fight to the death to protect their community.
To each of its own, I guess. I’m sure the people you shared your experiences with know the relative existence of the other side of the stories. :)
10. Zeek | August 31st, 2008 at 9:13 pm
Hello! good to hear you;re doing great in NYC and happy merdeka to you from the other side of the world! haha…
Well, it is just sad to know how we’re brought up and not able to speak our mind. Not only in school, but i totally feel it too even inworking life. My company encourages us to challenge our managers and bring out new ideas and it is people like me who often talk too much and challenge the managers. You can see some of them actually dont like it and they kinda, “branded” me. Though most of the expats and some managers who graduated overseas find no problem with that, but at the end of the day, i guess, this culture is not 100% adapted in Malaysian or should i say ,Asian culture yet.
Asian culture teach us to be polite and listen to the elders. And not, when our parents ask us to do something, we will challenge/fight back twice what they say, which often happen with kids nowadays. So i think its not that bad if we dont speak up most of the time. We talk and challenge when the time is right and any given platform (debate). I know you’re a smart and articulate person, so dont get intimidated by them. Explain to them our values and culture. Dat doesnt make you stupid or weird, dat gives you more character as a person.
11. hong (jen) | August 31st, 2008 at 9:29 pm
hi,
i just wanted to let you know i added you on facebook so you won’t be surprised XD
- hong
12. Samantha L. | August 31st, 2008 at 10:00 pm
Brilliant post. (:
13. RealGunners | August 31st, 2008 at 10:12 pm
from what i feel back in KL for the past few days, no flags hanging around at homes, no flags sticking out from cars, no Merdeka programs on radio and TV, no festive atmosphere on the streets, no nothing…. i suppose most people are too dejected to celebrate Merdeka this year…
anyway, yeah screw the Italians are food experts or French cuisine is exquisite etc.. the best food is always food from home! XD
14. benjamin lee meng chuin | August 31st, 2008 at 10:21 pm
not all of us have the oppurtunity to study abroad
treasure what you have
15. Malaysian Food in HK &laq&hellip | August 31st, 2008 at 11:09 pm
[...] Malaysian Food in HK September 1, 2008 Posted by wilson2002 in Food, HK. trackback Just one comment: Why can’t they be like those in USA? [...]
16. KY | August 31st, 2008 at 11:14 pm
I made sure they called me my full name when I was there too, but don’t ask me why I’m using KY now.. :/
17. weiqi | August 31st, 2008 at 11:39 pm
yea, it’s so hard to explain to other people about Malaysia. many of them already have the not-very-good impression on Malaysia and it’s not very persuasive for us to tell them things are actually not like what they think (it’s not even persuasive to us =.=)
but no matter what, malaysia will still be the country we love, right?? =)
18. nyrac | August 31st, 2008 at 11:47 pm
i totally understand what you had to say about the education system. but thankfully for me i had an english tuition teacher who practically showed me what i could be besides the meek spoonfed kid of the traditional system. she taught me one of the most precious lessons in life: always speak up for the truth, speak up for those who can’t do so, speak up for yourself, because if you don’t do so, nobody will do it for you.
and now that i’m in university and the lecturers are expected us to learn “the adult way”. with critical thinking and problem based learning and learning through seeing and tagging along and doing. and then when we don’t give them the results they had expected, they blame us for being not proavtive enough. sometimes i just want to tell them, the blame is not entirely on us, look at how we were brought up by the system.
anyway, yea, am glad you’re happy there :)
19. truffle | August 31st, 2008 at 11:49 pm
Malaysia is SO lucky to have a representative like you <3
20. grace | September 1st, 2008 at 12:15 am
despite the political issues, we can never ever not admit that m’sia is the best country of all haha.
ohh, and the education system, but nvm then we m’sians are quick learners after all, hope you are doing fine there su ann!
21. skyler | September 1st, 2008 at 1:17 am
don’t-sugar-coat-don’t-sugar-coat-don’t-sugar-coat-don’t-sugar-coat *chants wtf
I miss you pinkypau =(
22. songjun | September 1st, 2008 at 1:18 am
THE FOOD OMG :O :O :O IT LOOKS SO GOOOOOOOOOOD IF I COME VISIT U WE GO PENNYSLVANIAAAAA OK OMGGGG
anyway, tis pretty true about the education system though. But i guess its just an asian thing. Thats why Westerners can do things more efficiently and achieve understanding much faster however grounded knowledge is sometimes lacking. Asians can memorise better :P Sooo if u want a workforce that is good at doing something in a certain way, hire asians! If u want a workforce that is more off handle, hire westerners!
FOOOOOOOOOOD
23. chimpanzee | September 1st, 2008 at 1:36 am
yeah you’re right cos malaysia is our root and the place where we are brought up.there are memories that we’d never forget right?anyway su ann please post some photos of your uni when you’re free.take care :)
24. vvens | September 1st, 2008 at 1:57 am
haha you’re having homesick a little too early!
and its great that you have now found a restaurant that serves Malaysian food. good for you.
and hey, i saw us in this month’s issue of Seventeen magazine.
25. tanya | September 1st, 2008 at 2:00 am
your post brought tears to my eyes, for some reason. the sincerity and rawness is just so moving! :)
26. lishun | September 1st, 2008 at 2:36 am
there are so many great things about malaysia and just as many horrible parts too. sigh. i get quite sad when some people i know go abroad to expand their minds, only to return with a narrower view of their country of origin. i hope you will never be one of them. actually, i’m pretty confident you won’t!
the way we were taught to behave in school is so different from what colleges and universities demand that it’s no wonder we emerge from secondary school feeling totally confused.
i stepped into medical school after 13 years of being told what to do, only to find that now i am expected to question and debate and think and reason. my colleagues and i are constantly berated for our lack of initiative and our “take all, give none” attitude in learning. we take what the lecturers say as truth and we wait for them to teach, when in reality we should be developing a far more independent way of learning.
what sucks most is that those 13 years have caused so much damage that some of us think it’s our RIGHT to be spoon-fed, to be guided so strictly that there’s no room for questioning.
i wish we were encouraged from an early age to be participants and not sponges. it would make growing up and stepping out into the real world less of a shock.
it’s never too late to better yourselves, of course. but an early start can’t possibly be of any harm.
anyway, i love malaysia too. i am ridiculously optimistic about what malaysia has to offer, even if i am less than enthusiastic about the politics and economy at present. perhaps it’s true that our generation will be the one to rise up and take responsibility for this country. we shall see in 20yrs time!
27. kito | September 1st, 2008 at 3:01 am
I so totally understand what you mean when you say that when you are abroad, you are NOT just you, you ARE also a Malaysian. My own experience abroad, whether its on a trip or as an exchange student has given me a fair share of insight into what it really meant to be a Malaysian.
What Li Shun said is very correct… A decent amount of people who went abroad to expand their minds, only to return with a narrower view of their country of origin is a very very sad case. With all due respect, I really do understand where they are coming from but my own experience abroad seemed to make me love Malaysia even more.
I grow up in an environment where its the usual of everyone complaining about Malaysia: education not good la, Malay rights arguments la, bad infrastructures la, even worse public transports la etc. etc. the usual stuff… When I got a chance to live in Japan for a year - the so called most advanced Asian country and definitely the most technologically advanced in the world - I was thinking that maybe I might end up hating Malaysia even more… But I guess the reversed happened.
The conflicts you encountered in NYC Sue Ann, I had the same when I was in Japan. What do I tell them? Which part of Malaysia do I show them? Which is the right thing to do?
But at the end of the day, I think the small patriotic part inside my heart took over (hey, maybe those every morning singing of Negaraku in government school really did help k…)… I did not lie or sugarcoat anything I said in Japan. I told the truth, and never withheld facts… If it is bad, I tell them so. If it is good, I will beam with pride when I talk about them.
My frequent introduction to foreigners made me realized that: So what if we are nasty drivers on the roads? We are an even better host for tourist and visitors to our humble abode! So what if we have cut-throat exorbitant taxi-drivers? We have a hundred more Malaysian citizens who are more then willing to give a helping hand and other taxi-drivers who are more then proud to give free tours around the town! Politics? Well, I do not know much about it but I do my best to tell them what is not correctly portrayed by the west and things they did not get to read about…
In the end, I realized one thing. Whatever the shortcomings Malaysia have… It is still Malaysia. A place we called home since young. And regardless of how much and how many times I told myself that I prefer other countries over Malaysia when things don’t go right or when I gape in awe at other countries’ achievements… I HATE to admit it… But I am actually quite proud to me a Malaysian…
P/s: Wonder if anybody else felt the same after going abroad… =.=
28. da | September 1st, 2008 at 3:14 am
haha hopefully people in the US not as “lazy” as people here in oz-land (they try to shorten everyone’s name!) i m super craving for malaysian food now! looks sooo very good! australia doesnt have anything nearly as good enough to satisfy our malaysian tastebuds…=p i wan i wan!!=p
and u are right..there is no place like home…=))
29. bryanlyt | September 1st, 2008 at 3:19 am
wow! the malaysian food in the US looks more delicious than the ones we have here! omg *drools*
30. nat | September 1st, 2008 at 3:27 am
tell the truth, if asked about malaysia’s public transport, drivers etc, but do not complain about malaysia in any circumstances to people from other countries. because i know a couple of ex-malaysians (they converted to australians a few years after living in australia) who were actually dissing malaysian highways, driving skills, food hygiene etc to other people. while i could have spoken up for malaysia…. i didn’t know what to say… i was seething with anger or something else that these ex-malaysians are dissing my country. i don’t see anything wrong with our way of driving. haphard parking in penang is actually quite endearing to me. sigh. i get upset when a bad image of malaysia is portrayed to australians.
31. walau | September 1st, 2008 at 4:40 am
Regarding what you mentioned about your learning experiences in high school, well the situation is rather different in my class. We were never discouraged to discuss or correct the teacher. We often raise our hands to correct mistakes.
Maybe different schools have different methods. I’m from Kuching by the way.
32. TheRealAnonymous | September 1st, 2008 at 6:04 am
The best kangkung belacan I ever had was IN THAILAND !! LoL…
I’m stuck in UAE now. Damn sad okay… don’t EVER come here during puasa month. U aren’t allowed to be seen smoking, drinking or eating in public.
Just oni this morning I was given warning to be seen ‘carrying a cup of coffee’ in public.
Stupid anot u tell me?
33. Music Magi | September 1st, 2008 at 7:06 am
i felt the same way when i first went over to australia to do my MA and also lectured there. i thought it would be easy for me to make that change and adapt to life overseas especially with my background but i found myself at the receiving end of what people call culture shock!!! what???!!! but if you truly look at it, essentially it is…we are all so wired by our culture, upbringing and environment so much that it defines who we are. that’s enculturation…and when we go to a foreign land with their different cultures, system, societal habits, etc…we suddenly feel like we’re drowning and lost in a sea of ‘alien-ness’! that’s the first stage of culture shock girl! believe me, i was the last person i’d think i’d suffer from culture shock … but i did … and in the weirdest places… MIRI, Sarawak!!! ha ha ha…i felt so homesick…when i decided to move to sarawak to build my career early in my professional life.
but the good news is…it’s a phase we all go through. some move on and adapt pretty fast, but some just flounder and can’t wait to get out of their ‘adopted’ culture! honestly, i don’t think you’ll have any problems adjusting and blending in… in fact, in no time you’ll be quoting from American authors, and talking about American politics and be boiled over if and when the Yankees win the World Series again!
my advice is…go ahead…mix with the locals and meet as many friends as possible, learn up their culture, understand the people, love their lives! you don’t have to worry about losing our Malaysian-ness…we never will! in such a globalized world, we have everything at our doorsteps!!! look…who would have guessed that you could have pure ‘gula melaka’ at a restaurant in NYC!!!! now that’s globalization!!!
cheer up! embrace your new ‘adopted culture’ - love it, despise it… who cares - at the end of the day you and I, we are Malaysians, always have and always will be…wherever we go! what’s unique is that we Malaysians have learnt to adapt to our environments and survive! go and spread our ‘lah’ to the world!
34. sheon | September 1st, 2008 at 9:27 am
selamat hari kebangsaan malaysians!!!!
we are malaysia, and malaysia is us. paint a good picture about malaysia, but color it with truths and facts. sugarcoated if necessary.
malaysian education sucks. it oppresses critical thinking and makes students become good slaves. i still remember we HAD to memorized essays to pass our primary skol exams….wtf?
most cab drivers are s-holes. there are certainly some ethical ones, but they are pretty rare. hey, i have a fren who’s father is a cab driver, i had no qualms in telling her my opinion about malaysia’s cabbies.
wow….all the food look damn nice lor, except for the charkueytiao (it looks oily and fried under low heat). kangkong belacan is one of my mostest favoritest vege dish also. i think my mom ‘used’ to make the most kick-ass kangkong belacan ever. now she doesnt flavor her dishes as much due to health concerns. sigh. but still mom’s the best.
the malaysian meal must have cost a bomb!!!!
you make a good ambassador of malaysia. :)
35. chm | September 1st, 2008 at 9:31 am
PAU! I want dat roti canai bck here in Malaysia! Im in college and its still memorize info and puke out during exam. What’s the point of having mindless drones that are being churned outta public uni’s? God im actually ranting here. Anyway, happy changing ur education mindset!
36. king | September 1st, 2008 at 9:34 am
M’sia birthday should be on 16th sept and not 31st aug.
M’sia was formed on 16th sept 1963,with Sarawak,Sabah,Malaya and Singapura(seceded 1965)
37. Dan-yel | September 1st, 2008 at 9:58 am
Semangat Merdeka
38. yin | September 1st, 2008 at 10:21 am
hi there..i actually shed a tear while readin this post of urs. i totally share ur feeling..like 100%. i’m a msian..a really patriotic msian..loves my country no matter how bad or good it is. i’m currently studyin in aussie n had been here for a year n half, but, i’m still damn homesick. like urself..i enjoyed talkin bout msia, and introducin msia to all my international frens. i talked bout our famous multicultural bckground..n ppl are always amazed with msians bein able to speak in many languages =) when there’s like political discussion happenin in class, i always do my best to defend our country, not wantin to ruin our image or be thought as a terrorist country.
i’m really happy to knw someone that shares my feelings..u knw..its really rare to find non-bumis that love their country..and especially ppl of the younger generation =) thank u for lettin me knw that i’m not alone! hahha…anyway..msia boleh! hahah
39. angeliCassie | September 1st, 2008 at 11:52 am
hey su ann, i love reading what you write and this is just awesome..and yea i think you shouldn’t sugar coat stuff..just tell them the truth..because it’s the right thing to do.
do take care of yourself and can’t wait to read more of your adventure in NY! =)
Cassie
40. May | September 1st, 2008 at 12:14 pm
hello!
it’s a nice post eh…im sure u’ll find the familiarity and comfort in NY as well,mayb a lil diff from msia. =)
btw, this is the may tht happened to bumped into u at klcc with pinky.not sure if u remember me.lol. =)
41. chareli | September 1st, 2008 at 12:46 pm
what a heartfelt post.
it is nice to feel some love for Malaysia after what has been going on. well, i still do love Malaysia of course but sometimes, i just wonder like you do…
anyways, HAPPY MERDEKA DAY and lucky you!
the food looks damn awesome!
i still have yet to find good nasi lemak in sydney. sigh.
42. aBi | September 1st, 2008 at 1:12 pm
Speaking the truth and bashing your own country are two different things. I am sure your fellow students can tell how much you love M’sia. Speak the truth and be proud of being M’sian would be the best you can do. Besides who would hang a M’sian flag in their room if they don’t love their country.
Oh… and Chinatown in NY has a few M’sian restaurant I heard, go check them out.
43. ShaolinTiger | September 1st, 2008 at 3:09 pm
Yah definitely better to tell the truth, as long as it’s impartial not plain bashing.
I also had the same problem with the education system when I came here, I hate holding training here it’s so boring because no one asks questions, no one challenges me..
It’s just me talking endlessly….and praying for reciprocation occasionally, my only respite is when there is a westerner in the training sadly.
At least you’ll get a feeling of how I feel in Malaysia, I’m also not just me, I’m also white and British.
That looks like some wicked authentic Malaysian food too, not the usual trash sold abroad.
44. nickie | September 1st, 2008 at 4:17 pm
aiyoh your post stirred up so much emotions in me. now i feel guilty because i never thought of sugarcoating anything… in fact i can’t stand those people who do it. aih but i do know why they do it. and i guess to a certain extent its not a bad thing.
anyways. kangkung belacan looked good! i wannttt…
45. FeR | September 1st, 2008 at 5:10 pm
Su Ann, the homesick part - it’s point on! I couldn’t put it into words why I feel homesick but you described it exactly for me.
Unfortunately, no one to speak Manglish to here and there are just some words which doesn’t bring the same meaning/impact in English (for me, at least)
:)
Malaysia=home
Can’t wait for CNY!
46. aunt | September 1st, 2008 at 6:33 pm
forgot to ask u. how many m’sians in your batch/intake for columbia colle?…..potential to organise m’sian pot luck etc.
and how many got potential to play mahjong? hahaha.. ok.ok..i’m seriously kidding…i know that i got no hope of converting you. :(
47. CraSH | September 1st, 2008 at 7:31 pm
wait a minute! are you in NYU or Columbia?
anyway, i am sure you will get used to life in NYC. it is not that bad… its pretty easy to get around if you know the subway. but! do ask for a brochure at the counter and understand how the subway works.
if you need more help! can always contact me.. or i can have some friends in NY or NYU help you out….
hmm.. banana leaf is pretty yummy in philly and it is just a block from my buddies place who works for the philly fed reserve. well, hope you have a fun time in NYC, and remember to get some warm clothing! its going to freeze soon… my advice is to get a really good ski jacket from north face, burton, spyder or columbia… trust me!! you will be using it for the next 4 yrs you are here.
48. -aiping- | September 1st, 2008 at 7:47 pm
Hey, I just wanted to say that I think you’re a great writer. I’ve always thought that the mark of a good writer was someone who manages to articulate his/herself with just the right words so that the reader goes, “omg that’s EXACTLY how I felt, I just couldn’t find the words to describe it”.. and the past few posts I’ve read about u being in college in NYC is kinda like that… I just graduated from my undergrad from Vassar (which is like 2 hours north of the city) and I just started grad school at the Cornell medical campus (68th St and York) and most of all, I really really miss home too… reading about ur new experiences in the US kinda remind me of me 4 years ago.. haha… but yea, it still means a great deal to me to meet and hang out with Malaysians when I’m in the US, it just makes me so.. happy… so if u ever feel like u need some Malaysian company and some food (i brought lots over from home too.. haha..), drop me an email and I would love to meet up with u.. I hope u’re having fun in NYC and if u also need advice/help with stuff here let me know!
49. Kiran | September 1st, 2008 at 7:53 pm
Hi Pinkpau,
Wow, you are lucky to be able to indulge Malaysian cuisine in NYC. Here in Orlando FL, there isn’t ONE restaurant!!! Sigh, how i miss my motherland food. Thank god i know how to make sambal. And there is a Chinese market here where i get my chinese vege and supplies. Luck is not all that bad I guess ;)
50. Anonymous | September 1st, 2008 at 8:09 pm
Lol, I’m surprised N. Americans even know where Malaysia is let alone it’s political situation. Last time I checked, it was just the tourist destination to go to after passing by Thailand. And maybe China and Japan too. Your profs seem very nice and eager to have ice-breakers. I remember that only our dorm/ resident hall tutors would do that the first week (frosh/fresher’s week). Profs just lectured. Enjoy NYC! I wish I could study there! Be safe!
51. theincrediblesulk | September 1st, 2008 at 8:11 pm
hie, im still not liberated from the throes of missing you. *pout.
52. Tai | September 1st, 2008 at 9:43 pm
I have to disagree with you on two things.
First off, to all your classmates from .us who believe that the .us education system inculcates in the students an attitude of always questioning. This is *very* *very* wrong. You need to go and read more - quite a few Americans actually believe that the education system here is used to train the students to be sheep so that the populace is easier to control. I offer the following as an anecdote: http://crankylitprof.wordpress.com/2008/07/31/put-on-a-pot-of-single-malt-im-preparing-to-rant/
My second disagreement with you is about the .my school system. I went to Methodist Primary School, the Sekolah Menengah Damansara Jaya, then Sekolah Menengah SEA Park for Form 6. While there were instances of teachers not being teachers - for example, in Standard 2, we were asked to come up with 10 synonyms for 10 words. Being a smart aleck, I pulled out my father’s thesaurus and found the longest word for each of the 10. I was graded 0/10, and told off in class that I should not lie and make up words if I wasn’t going to do my homework. The one example the teacher pulled out - jail. My synonym was penitentiary. Not a very good teacher. However, there were other teachers in my primary school that more than made up for her (and really, she wasn’t that bad, from what I remember, she was pretty good - she just didn’t know any of the 10 words I had pulled out, apparently).
However, in my secondary school, I was exposed to quite a few good teachers. Mrs. Tan, my math teacher was very good, and would entertain questions, and check to make sure we really understood her lessons. My classmates and I would go to her after class to get more explanations or for help with homework. Well, my classmates more than me, I was really good with math in those days :) Similarly, my science teachers were very good. Of course, all the good teachers had to be balanced out by a teacher who said I was lying simply because I pulled out M$20 from various hidden places in my school bag (that the prefects couldn’t find during a schoolwide search for people bringing more than M$4 to school). I have no idea what I was lying about - she asked me to go find my money, and I did, and I took it to her. WTF was I lying about?
In my Form 6 days, we had some very good teachers, some mediocre teachers and a couple of… oh well. Mrs… oh crap, I have forgotten her name… Au Yang I believe, our Physics teacher, was very good. She encouraged discussions during class. The other chatterbox in the class and I would start up discussions that could last half a class. He and I would find and ask each other weird questions - if the moon only goes around the earth once a day, why do we have high tides twice a day?! If the volume control on a radio is actually a rheostat, does playing a song at low volume use less electricity than at high volume? How much electricity is lost through the volume control? Mrs. Au Yang would scribble equations on the board and work it through with us.
Even the stereotypical write on board and teach from notes chemistry teacher would entertain questions from us, and every once in a while would make sure we really understood difficult parts and talk to us.
Was this all because we were in Form 6, and was expected to be more independent and all that? Part of that may be in play. But I had the same experience during my primary school and secondary school days. Was I just extremely lucky in getting to a good school?
So, I believe part of that “spoonfeed” attitude may be something that the students thought they should do, and it becomes part of their personality, whereas, for some reason, the batch of students I grew up with had very strong personalities (bunch of Mensans and other over achievers).
I should note that years after I left school, when I met with my teachers, they still thought fondly of my year, both at SMDJ and SM SEA Park, saying that we were the best and brightest year. Other years may have had better results than we did at SPM, but were only “book smart”. So, was my batch just unusual? I don’t think so, I’ve met some very smart people from other schools/years.
53. Tai | September 1st, 2008 at 10:19 pm
also, i remember how we were generally not encouraged to engaged in discussion. teachers come in, write on the whiteboard and blab to a bunch of faces, give homework and leave.
I’ve been thinking a bit more about that bit. I think one of the factors may be that the teachers have a set syllabus, and they worry about completing their syllabus. There were a few times when we did not finish the syllabus for a particular class, due to whatever reasons. If you have discussions that take up half the class, that time must be made up somewhere else. Hence, we also had a lot of discussions out side of class. And my classmates and I were generally tight (oh boy, we would go through SS2 catching rats at night for our bio dissection class, or go to the lake and go toad hunting. We found out that toads would squirt what looks like pee if they get really frightened, and a lot of fun was had trying to get your toad to squirt on someone else! :)) so discussions took place in class, after class, and outside of class. Some of us also met up for study groups.
54. hong (jen) | September 1st, 2008 at 11:14 pm
i think you should of checked about the international texting rate with them before purchasing the SIM card? and to my understanding sending international text and receiving it could be quiet expensive. my boyfriend has a friend who does business overseas… and he spends like 1k USD on the phone bill calling/texting outside the US. -_-
55. confused @@ | September 1st, 2008 at 11:27 pm
Just who and what are you disagreeing?
“classroom culture in our respective countries” quote pinkpau
so why you pick on usa?
“My second disagreement with you is about the .my school system…”quote Tai
i reread the post thrice, I am pretty sure nobody said anything abt ur sch system?
56. confused @@ | September 1st, 2008 at 11:29 pm
sorry folks!
comment 55 is for 53 attention
57. Tai | September 1st, 2008 at 11:45 pm
.my == Malaysian, for #56.
Maybe because we were such chatterboxes in class, the “keep it quiet” atmosphere didn’t affect us?
58. Anonymous | September 2nd, 2008 at 1:24 am
Oh btw, I had an urge to point out that professors in N. America do encourage students asking questions and voicing different opinions, but only if it worded as a respectful question, from the point of view of someone who does not understand or who has heard an interesting bit of news and would like a more knowledgable member of staff’s opinion. They would not toleerate students asking too many questions during lecture time (one reason being that it often distracts from the main lecture content), especially if the questions are directly challenging and provocative.
General student opinion of other students who ask a lot of questions is generally relief as in, less actual lecturing time, or annoyance, for the same reason. But these attitudes do still vary depending on the professor/student, some professors, even in America, till prefer the ’shut up and listen’ type of attitude that is ‘practised in Asia’.
59. Leesa | September 2nd, 2008 at 2:12 am
Speaking of Malaysian food in NYC, there’s this really great place in Chinatown on Canal & Browery. It’s called New Malaysia Restaurant and its a bit of a hidden spot but it tastes really authentic! Compared with any other place in NYC, it’ll probably also be one of yr cheapest meals. Here’s the website: http://www.yelp.com/biz/new-malaysia-restaurant-new-york
I used to spend a lot of time in NYC when my boyfriend used to live there. We lived in Soho and ate there a lot cause it was cheap and reminded me of home.
Good luck in NYC. You’ll love it in no time.
60. Simon Seow | September 2nd, 2008 at 4:02 am
Hmm.. the CKT don’t look so appetizing but it’ll do to cure you homesickness. Well, don’t put too much pressure on yourself, just be yourself. They don’t want to know a Malaysian, they want to know Lim Su Ann.
61. ju | September 2nd, 2008 at 5:29 am
omg.. you totally made me homesick with that post!!! Belacan Kangkung!!! WAAAAaaaaAAaa~~!!!
62. kreazi | September 2nd, 2008 at 5:48 am
OMG, kangkung belacan is also probably the only green leafy vege i would eat willingly w/o having a knife or gun pointed at me!!! We have almost the same name.. now, same penchant for kangkung? Hahahhhaa
63. king | September 2nd, 2008 at 6:45 am
M’sia birthday should be 45yrs & not 51st.
hope S’wak & S’bah MP fight for this,because for so long ignored by malayan.
read this;//mt.m2day.org/2008/content/view/12095/84/
SarawakPatriotic
64. joiz3 | September 2nd, 2008 at 7:56 am
i was looking forward to reading your merdeka post cos i enjoyed yours a lot last year. =) i posted this on my blog “i wish i were mature enough for merdeka to mean more to me than just another public holiday…”. i sincerely mean it. i feel that i’m just another 17-year-old hanging around m’sia who probably is being fed way too much of american culture. it’s sad to say that the environment i’m in right now is the typical chinese “m’sia sucks. get out of it asap.” mentality. i hate to agree to that because i desire for my homeland to mean something to me. i desire for independence day to mean something to me. it doesn’t right now. i simply spent the whole day lazing around more than half the time forgetting that it was independence day. i didn’t like the comment which i got on that post abt merdeka which i posted - “merdeka really is just another public holiday. there’s no more meaning to it” - from a friend of mine who is currently studying in australia who was from my school. disappointing. =( one of the things that i enjoy about your blog is that you are so aware of the ongoings in m’sia.. something that many sec school students today need to learn to do so. in doing so it shows that you really care for this nation - i hope to be able to do so too soon - thanks su ann for your spirit of patriotism. it encourages me. =)
65. EVo | September 2nd, 2008 at 8:51 am
Happy merdeka su ann!
Thailand’s currently under martial law..
States in msia under PKR gvnence having public hol on 16 sep..
Eye on m’sia will be relocated to malacca soon..
So there u have it just in case u haven’t checked today’s asian news since ur alllllll the way there :P
How’s class 2day?
66. Milky cavana | September 2nd, 2008 at 9:06 am
Negaraku…the place my blood was shed..
67. whimsicaljottings | September 2nd, 2008 at 11:19 am
DAMMIT, All that FOOD!!!!! I am freezing my @55 off in Sweden now, eating all the borrrrrringgggg Scandinavian food, cold cuts, rolls, fruit for breakfast at the hotel here. They dont know what food is coz theyve not eaten nasi lemak, bak kut teh, wan tan mee, curry, OMG why am I torturing myself, WHY??? It will be years till I get my grubby paws on Malaysian food again. Sob sob sob :( :(
68. pinkpau | September 2nd, 2008 at 5:08 pm
WTFFFF i replied all the comments only to have everything DISAPPEAR when i pressed submit!!!!!!!!!!!!! what is this!!!!!!!!!!!!
haih nvm reply again when i come back ok!
69. Jeff from LA | September 3rd, 2008 at 12:37 am
Su Ann, there’s no need to sugarcoat things, because that will just affect your credibility with them. Rather, what you should do is give them both the good and the bad. You can tell them about the bad drivers, etc. but then also share with them all of the wonderful things that you love about your country. Give them the whole picture and I’m sure it will be fine.
I mean I was born in the US and I lived my whole life here, but when I lived in Asia I loved it as well and I still miss it. Your discussions of Malaysia have really incited a desire in me to visit Malaysia even though you talk about the good and the bad of Malaysia (i.e. corruption, everything). So don’t worry about sugarcoating anything, share with them your love for your country and they will come to see it as you see it - a wonderful place that produces wonderful people.
70. ront | September 3rd, 2008 at 8:36 am
banana leaf in NYC or Philly?
then again, there must be at least 1 banana leaf restaurant in every city….
i spent my merdeka being sick….wtf
71. :D | September 4th, 2008 at 11:23 am
hey! haha i’m planning to go to US for college too! but in my first days there, i won’t have a nice aunt or boyfriend to take me around sightseeing, do malaysian stuff or comfort me in my saddest homesick moments. ;(
about the image you present of malaysia to the world, i feel that you should speak on what you think is the true situation here (how our politics suck etc) but make it clear through like some disclaimer or smth that we’re all TOTALLY patriotic and cinta malaysiaku though some aspects of it suck SO much. things don’t have to be perfect to be loved. haha malaysia boleh! have fun in nyc and don’t forget your blog readers okay!
72. Hanna | September 5th, 2008 at 4:21 am
I say the truth is the truth. Good or bad is up to the listener to judge.
But if there is no good or if you had a different history back home, would you have turned out the way you are now?
73. Chen Chow | September 5th, 2008 at 4:16 pm
Happy Belated Merdeka to you! Great that you put up a huge Malaysia flag at your room! I used to do that too! This just shows that how we, Malaysians, feel a lot about our country, although I won’t dare to say that everyone is happy with the going ons in the country.
I guess the way we could share with others is to share about what we think are objective answers. We tell the issues from various angles. For example, I would be telling them on why this policy is in place, say affirmative action. Why we need it? How is the reaction from each group etc? Of course, there might be stereotyping.
Enjoy! And make full use of your life there!!!
74. wen chin | September 7th, 2008 at 2:25 am
Su ann, I just want to say that reading your blog makes people happy. =P
keep it up!
75. maRCus | September 8th, 2008 at 12:51 pm
i can relate to your experience. ive been to japan and korea, and automatically, the Malaysian in you will resound!
you appreciate things more when they’re gone or far away.
Nice post/. :-D
76. collection agency for cou&hellip | October 1st, 2008 at 12:23 pm
collection agency for court debt…
pocketing!speeding.Knudsen …
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