Panic Attack
November 21st, 2008
it’s one of those ridiculous days where everything i touch seems to crumble. i am flailing in a sea of my own skin. i also have this frustrating urge to fly.
i did a million things today but i still feel like erasing everything. with many rough, jagged, vengeful swipes. except for that moment at the MoMA store where i picked up the prism photo frame and turned it over in my hands. that moment, i want to keep. because it resonated with me. i feel like i’ve encountered that block of glass at some point in my life and it’s something that’s going to be very important to me. do you believe in resonance? i do. i believe in resonance, and i believe in affinity. i believe in trust. i believe in tenderness. i also believe that there are cures, but i was sorely disappointed today at the hokkien mee in Nyonya that failed to heal my heart. so i guess i’m still broken.
Entry Filed under: General
28 Comments
1. MIchelle | November 21st, 2008 at 6:29 pm
Try coffee. Or chocolate. It did warm mine. :D
2. pinkpau | November 21st, 2008 at 6:36 pm
michelle, i am utterly confused at how you managed to post a comment. i locked the comments for this post!!!! likewise i am equally confused how i am able to post a comment myself
3. pinkpau | November 21st, 2008 at 6:38 pm
ok this is very weird. i cant seem to lock comments for this post.
bah.
goodnight guys. i am going to sleep off this amazingly horrible day
4. reallybites | November 21st, 2008 at 6:54 pm
cook the hokkien mee yourself!
5. george | November 21st, 2008 at 8:07 pm
i can post! hahaha
this is the first time in a long time i've managed to post when there's less than 10 comments :p
anyway, just smile, grin, whatever, you'll feel better :D
6. Gin | November 21st, 2008 at 9:16 pm
wah..i can “hear” the gan jiong ness of ure post.. lol..but huggles woman. the pinkpau always prevails.
and wtf george.. ure pic damn cute
7. carolyong | November 21st, 2008 at 10:16 pm
come su ann i give you hug :( i'm sorry the hokkien mee in nyonya was bad - let's make it our mission to find the most decent hokkien mee in nyc.
don't be too sad okay let's shop our worries our way soon. i hear woodbury's having black friday sales…..
8. carolyong | November 21st, 2008 at 10:17 pm
ehhhhh hello there george. guess who! :)
p.s.it's so obvious you did that *points to avatar* yourself haha.
9. MIchelle | November 22nd, 2008 at 3:50 am
Huh? I mean it's not locked…
10. pinkpau | November 22nd, 2008 at 3:54 am
it is on my dashboard.. it's set to Comments Off but the comments box still appears when u click on the post. so weird. haih donno lah
11. Nick Chhan | November 22nd, 2008 at 6:58 am
SuAnn, your comment management system is different from the Wordpress system - the dashboard doesn't help. You need to logon to your Disqus admin, and goto moderation. URL is http://disqus.com/admin/moderate/
On the right click on “Moderate Threads”, then you will have the option to turn off comments for any blog post.
12. CraSH | November 22nd, 2008 at 7:53 am
there is a malaysian rest in flushing that has awesome hokkien mee…. its near to main street and across from macy's/gap
13. Bunbread | November 22nd, 2008 at 8:10 pm
I'm having a rough time here too.
Haagendazs ice cream didn't even help to heal. :(
I'm confused.
'Friends' aren't really friends anymore. They don't trust you though you trust them.
It's so tiring and heartbreaking to be unrequited.
14. melissa | November 23rd, 2008 at 12:36 am
I'd make you wings, which I could. Though I can't guarantee that they'd make it to New York from Malaysia in one piece. Or that they'd help you to fly. But that's what the imagination is for.
I believe in resonance too - in meeting such different people, whom I met through a myriad of circumstances, whom I share so much with, that I could never possibly forget them. That when my mind comes back to them, and the fact that (for most of the time, especially now) they're not nearby for me to tell them how much they mean to me, I start to cry inside, and sometimes it shows on the outside.
I don't think it means I'm broken. I think it's simply that I've given many parts of my heart away, each to a special person. :)
cheer up, Su Ann!
here, have a virtual peanut butter cup, they make most things better.
15. sheon | November 23rd, 2008 at 2:33 am
cheer up pinks. you have bad hair days..and you have great hair days.
when you come back, i'd buy you all the best hokkien mee in town. oh, prawn mee is also known as hokkien mee in the northern states.
16. seowqj | November 23rd, 2008 at 10:54 am
Brick Walls are there for a reason:
They let us prove how badly we want things;
Let us show our dedication.
17. Anon. | November 23rd, 2008 at 10:59 am
Mmm, I don't believe in resonance. What I do believe is that the experiences you have, and the people you meet, will play an important part to defining who you are and what you do, and how you think in the future -some having more of an impact than others. At the end of the day, you'll realize, everyone is and must sail their own ship. Maybe you'll be so lucky to have some people sail a short while with you before you part, or maybe you'll be one of those rare lucky ppl who will have ppl sail with them most of the way. But that's rare - and maybe that could be called resonance…. But after all, we all have different destinations, different goals and different places to go. Life.
18. george | November 23rd, 2008 at 1:32 pm
carol duh :p haha
and isn't that the point of an avatar? an image to represnt yourself? haha
19. george | November 23rd, 2008 at 1:33 pm
cute people have cute pictures.. hahahaha
20. Jin | November 23rd, 2008 at 1:50 pm
i would like to say cheer up, su ann! but it appears that everyone else has said so already, so… >___>
*pats for the broken heart*
21. passer-by | November 23rd, 2008 at 2:59 pm
(:
22. Adrian | November 23rd, 2008 at 6:31 pm
eh thats my banana on plurk!
23. MRDAKOTA | November 24th, 2008 at 8:37 am
Hey gorgeous.
Hope you feel better soon!
24. pinkpau | November 24th, 2008 at 1:30 pm
michelle : hehe i have
reallybites : WHAT. haha i will do no such thing lest it taint the memory of hokkien mee in my heart forever
george : it's not that easy *dramatic
gin : hahaha the pinkpau always prevails!
carolyong : OMG NO… not woodbury!!!!!
crash : what is this place called?
nick : eh! you're right, it works that way. i think that's what i did the last time but i totally forgot to do it this time around. thanks so much!! :D
bun bread : i dont know what's going on, but.. *hugs* :)
melissa : i believe you may have misunderstood my post, but s'okay. haha. it was interesting to hear your thoughts on resonance
sheon : REALLY AH. ah yes the penang hokkien mee is our prawn mee, and vice versa, yes?
seow : i'm always too discouraged to scale.. :)
anon : but everything you just said doesnt have to be exclusive from resonance!
jin : hehe thank u
passerby : (:
adrian : no its not…. O_O
mr dakota : i am! :))
25. LifeForRent | November 24th, 2008 at 8:33 pm
Maybe this will make you feel better….I said MAYBE ok so dont get ur hopes up!!
I was surfing my old Multiply ytd and I stumbled on to an old photo album of us. That time when we met up at Midvalley after not seeing each other for like yonks…
very very nostalgic =D
http://www.Sup3rman.multiply.com
26. pinkpau | November 24th, 2008 at 8:41 pm
arthur! such cool photos. why do i look so much older at 16 then i do at 20…
eh dont stand so near me in the group photo. later your gf jealous
27. CraSH | November 25th, 2008 at 7:20 am
near to main and rosevelt.. if not mistaken it should be by prince or 40th… and the place is called malaysian restaurant.. but i might be wrong becuase i just go in and chomp away.. hahaha.. dont usually notice the shops name
28. LifeForRent | November 26th, 2008 at 11:47 pm
hahaha i cant believe u rmbr that….well that ones long gone so jealous gf's aren't going to be much of a problem anymore…hehehe