Midas

it’s late in the evening. i’m so exhausted today that i just want to wrap everything up and give it all away. i dont often feel like this but today i feel so alone, amidst the clanging of the bells from the streets that are boxing me in and the loud voices of all the people who are close to and far from me. i dont want to be touched and i dont want to want anything, but i do want my heart to melt away into something unrecognizable and easily forgettable, like the sounds of the traffic lights as they tick time away, or the many different pillars in the parking lot at ikano power center. sometimes i wake up and i am 27 years old, in that place and state of mind that i once tried to put myself into as i was struggling to fall asleep, and i wonder if i am you, momentarily, pure and undisturbed by me. i am like this void at night, that moves over things and fills them with all kinds of sadness and trepidation, until at long last i am empty as the sky and you are just you. does it become easy to rest? do you remember them times talkin’ in your sleep? i heard a long, long time ago in a living room far, far away that a sad song makes it better. not always, but there is a soft breeze just outside the window, and it is wonderful tonight.



10 Comments

i am seeing pink again! it’s you, you and no doubt, you.

27 years old? That’s a bit ahead!

sweatlee

dont like the font type and the font size, it’s not you! and the banner too. wtf i’m so picky, but i just want the old pink blog, and eliza’s eyes? that’s my quaintly.net

i don’t like the way u made 27 sounds like it’s OLD! ihatechuuuuuu

Seems like having problems to sleep !

No one says it like you do, Su Ann!
(Being 27 is very hard to imagine, as I’m only almost 18 haha)

in a few hours, i’ll be flying off to india for a month’s holiday. alone. you’ve infected me with your melancholy.

gwen

I cannot say this enough – you write SO incredibly beautifully. Welcome back, Su Ann. Please don’t leave us this time round.

CD

Song references! Eric Clapton, The Beatles, and.. Switchfoot? Hahah. Love the way you write.

London

Well, I woke up today and I AM, still, 27. But in my dreams (which I try to prolong), I wake up and I am…30, sometimes 32. Guess you are always still young if you can wake up and imagine a different life in the years that have yet to come.

Different, not necessarily better, but different. And often, that’s good enough – for a while.

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